Current mood:	blank
Current music:	Time After Time | Norah Jones

You don't have to be filthy rich for your world to revolve around money.
I left the computer for my mom to use early this evening. I went down, started to take a nap, conquered the forever-loved sofa. It was a good sleep. It was a good sleep that started a good night. Or so I thought it was. I woke up hearing a mad typer killing the keypads of my laptop... only to find out that it was my mom using the laptop. Finally getting back to my senses after the just-woke-up phase we get after sleeping, I realized that I gave the internet up for my mom to use for a while. And there she was, crying. Not like it does not happen often. It does. And that is exactly why I'm writing right now. I often see her cry. It a pretty good life that we have. Leisure can be coveted often. Ask and we shall receive. But with this kind of life, we leave my mom and dad fighting over petty things, arguing over money which is least likely to be fought on. And so, getting back to what happened tonight, I kinda had to put up a brave face. I had to pretend as though I didn't care. Well, I do, it's just that I always choose to look indifferent because I won't be able to help anyway. And even if I try to, say, help, she will just push me away and tell me that I should not care because I won't be able to help. So yeah, same thing. Often I do not understand these grown-ups I had no choice but to call my parents. Hey, I love them. Of course I do. It's just that it's hard to make sense out of the labyrinth they're making out of their lives. They use the internet to talk. And I become just glad to see that because, hey, it's the closest thing they get to being together... and then all of a sudden there's a storm running from Manila to Guam. And how lame is that? Maybe they're getting too much of the speed this life has. Or maybe they just don't know how to stop and wonder upon the words and thoughts they have that's why they just render anything they think of hence the unwanted words. Thus, the fights.

I'm used to it, really, I grew up with them fighting. Like, before, they almost got separated. Good thing I made them a drawing of a happy family. And (yey?) they got back together. But really I have long given up the thought of a peaceful household. For real, I don't really care if they part ways or not. Growing up waking up to your parents quarelling? Your parents fighting when dad comes home? Gah, separation is nothing. Well, I don't think that's really going to happen. It's just me and my thoughts.

I am not writing this for the world to see the noise that bothers me here at home. I am writing this because in this world, I can show that I care. As I can show that I can be indifferent. In this world, the tone of my words can't be heard. And you, reader, won't even know if I am crying as I write this. Okay, I'll give it away. No I am not crying right now. You know why? Because these words can cry for me, because tonight's incident is just one of the many I have been through, because I choose to be oblivious, I choose to have my own world... and because somehow, my mother's happy.The dollar to peso exchange is 1=48.something. Ah yes, her happiness.